The families of Tajikistan, in contrast to European families, are traditionally very large. Relationships are built primarily on unquestioning obedience to the owner of the house and respect for elders.
A woman has a special role in a Tajik family. Despite such an unacceptable attitude for European women, it still cannot be called discrimination.
After all, such a relationship has developed over the centuries. And having passed many trials, sometimes in difficult local conditions, the understanding of the correctness of such relations only strengthened. The age for the marriage of girls is 13-14 years. And, despite the law, according to which girls must wait until their majority, marriages are still concluded behind the scenes.
The marriage bond is fixed by the Imam, not the registry office. The life of Tajiks is defined by Islam. Religion is felt in everything: in everyday life, in traditions, in relationships, in art and in raising children. Rituals play a special role, especially weddings. The registry office is visited only at will, but the "Nikah" ritual, which is performed by the local mullah, is mandatory.
Without this, marriage will not be considered a marriage, and children will be illegally born. The bride is put on seven headscarves. The mule speaks water, and the bride must drink it. Forty days after the wedding, the young wife wears a national costume.
Everyone is invited to the wedding: relatives, friends, colleagues and even just acquaintances. The wedding takes place in several stages: at the beginning at the bride's house, then at the groom's house, then a general wedding and a walk for friends and colleagues. More than 500 people attend the most modest weddings.
Circumcisions, the birth of a child and many other memorable events are also celebrated magnificently. It is very important for Tajiks that the tables are full and there is not a single free space. And it doesn't matter that food remains, it is important that there is plenty of it. The elders lead everything, and the young only perform.
Traditionally, it should be kalym (bride price). There is a certain list of what the newlyweds should take from their parents. Most often, the "dowry" begins to collect from the birth of the child. In general, young people are completely dependent on their parents.
After marrying very early, they really still do not understand a lot. And even if the young people suddenly do not like something, they will remain silent. The elders are wiser and know what is right. This is how children are raised.
Polygamy is not uncommon in Tajikistan. Officially, of course, polygamy is prohibited, but in practice it is not uncommon. Of course, there is no registration, but the first, and the second, and maybe the third are still called the wife.
In rural areas, girls do not complete more than eight grades. After all, according to tradition, a woman does not need to be educated at all. Her destiny is to be a wife and a mother.
It is very scary and shameful for Tajik girls to be a "sit-out". Not getting married on time is worse than the worst nightmare. A Tajik woman should always be silent. Without the permission of her husband or mother-in-law, she has no right to go out into the street.
Only women are engaged in the household. It is shameful for a man to do such work. According to the established tradition, for the first six months, a young wife cannot leave her husband's house, and in no case should she visit her parents.
A lot of household chores are assigned to her at once. She is completely subordinate in everything to her mother-in-law and to all other older relatives, but first of all to her husband.
According to the wedding tradition, the bride must cry. This is what happens at all weddings.
Tajik women themselves are very beautiful. They have beautiful dark eyes of an unusual shape. National clothes: dress and pants under this dress made of beautiful fabric.
Tajik families are filled with children. There are as many of them as God gives. From an early age, babies are very active and independent. They are friends with large companies, and most importantly, they are brought up in traditions from childhood.
The older guys take care of the younger ones, the younger ones obey the older ones and go everywhere together. Big children carry small ones, middle ones run after older ones.
Children themselves are very sociable and active. From a very young age, they are helpers to their family. They quickly and eagerly carry out any assignments of adults. They easily cope with livestock and numerous household chores.
Children do not live separately, they fully take part in the life of the family. Tajiks do not force their children to sleep, do not force them to eat, do not hide adult affairs from them. Children live the same way as adults: they obey their elders, work like an adult and are responsible for their actions.
Tajiks are very hospitable people. A guest for them is always a great joy. Any host considers it his duty to treat a guest deliciously. Each house has a large room called "Mehmonhona" specially designed for receiving guests. It always has a special place of honor for the main guest.
Tajiks sit on the floor, covered with beautiful carpets and mattresses stuffed with cotton or cotton, which are called kurpachi. According to their rules, you cannot sit with your legs extended forward or to the side. Lying is also indecent.
A tablecloth called "dostarkhan" is laid on the floor. Before and after the feast, prayer, thanksgiving and praise to the Almighty are required. The Tajiks have their own ritual, different from other Muslims.
Tea plays an important role in the feast. The youngest man pours it. They drink, as is customary, from a bowl, which you need to take only with your right hand, and hold your left on the right side of your chest. Tajiks can afford alcohol too.
An interesting fact is that the first bowl of any drink is poured not to someone else, but to himself. All this is just a custom, so that others are convinced that there is no poison in the drink. For the invited guest, Tajiks will definitely cook pilaf. In ordinary everyday life, the eldest of the family is the first to take food, but when there is a guest in the house, this honor is given to the guest.
The women eat separately at the other end of the house. They are not allowed to enter the premises during the men’s feast. Any outsider who wants to communicate with a woman must definitely ask permission from her husband or the owner of the house. Tajik men never walk around the house in night clothes or with a bare torso.
If the owner is not at home, but a guest has come, the wife is obliged to invite him into the house. But a man shouldn't go there. Unauthorized men cannot communicate with a woman in the absence of her husband, father, or other male relative.
Tajiks are very fond of giving gifts. They will never come to visit without gifts. In general, Tajik men are very generous. They are earners for their family and it is important for them that everything in the house is enough for everyone. But what matters most to them is the opinion of neighbors, friends, and relatives. They strive to maintain excellent relationships and a good opinion of themselves.
For Tajiks, the family is the foundation of their life. They work for the family, they boast of the family. Everything described above is the image of a traditional Tajik family. In the modern world, many began to build their lives in the image of the West. However, there are still many families who value their traditions.